September 2010 Archives

Gun Oil

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I stumbled upon an interesting product on drugstore.com today: a very male oriented lube called Gun Oil.
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Okay, I get it. A man's penis is his gun. And not only can you get "gun oil" for your man-gun, but it is "rapid-fire lubricant in a leak-proof pump." Hmmm...rapid-fire to me sort of suggests premature ejaculation.

Read the blurb and it only gets stranger:
"When you encounter heavy action, this premium lubricant keeps your most important weapon well oiled. The concept for this high-tech formula was deployed by Marines from Operation Desert Storm who lubed up with actual military-issue gun oil in the trenches of the Kuwaiti battlefields. Gun Oil won't dry out and provides a long-lasting glide. Perfect for face-to-face maneuvers or solo missions...Gun Oil is condom safe and contains no spermicide."

Who wrote this ad?

"...lubed up with actual military-issue gun oil in the trenches of the Kuwaiti battlefields?"

That sentence in particular is just so odd in this context it brings up a few issues:

1. It sounds bad for your health. Military issue gun oil has got to be irritating to sensitive tissues.
2. It would seem hard to get in the mood while in a trench in Kuwait.
3. Were these "face-to-face maneuvers" or "solo missions?"

Believe it or not, the product actually got some good reviews.

Ayatollah #2

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sugar.jpg

Can anyone say"Little Chrissy" ?

Ayatollah #1

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A few months ago I had a patient who, when I asked what he preferred to be called, replied "Call me Ayatollah." I'm not naming any names (for his sake and to avoid a stiff fine) but he was pasty white and not very Ayatollah-like. But, he was such a smart ass I called him Ayatollah anyway.
When we sent him home he asked me for my email address so he could send me "funny things." So I gave him my work email and the material has been flowing in.
I might have to dedicate a section of my blog to him because the next several posts will all be his doing. I'm just too busy or unmotivated to go looking for juicy blog material when everyone's grandma finds better shit to write about.thorazine.jpg
Now we just tie them down. What ever happened to the good old days?

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This page is an archive of entries from September 2010 listed from newest to oldest.

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